Saying So Long to Struggle

Our society teaches us that we must work hard and struggle to have the things that will make us happy at some future time. We have an entire society stuck in the “I’ll be happy when…” fantasy loop.

I’ll be happy when I get that job!
I’ll be happy when I get that relationship.
I’ll be happy when I’m healed.
I’ll be happy when I have more money.
I’ll be happy when ‘they’ leave me alone.
I’ll be happy when ‘they’ recognize my true worth.

I’ll be happy when…

However, what if being stuck in the “I’ll be happy when…” loop is one of the primary reasons why we’re not happy? In fact, what if most if not all of the things you’ve been told about how to live life and be happy are just plain wrong?

Now, here is a truly revolutionary thought. What if the key to being happy is to stop thinking about the things you don’t have and start enjoying the things that are already there. Like sunshine on your face or a wonderful meal or the love of a true friend.

Our lives exist in the gap between where we are now and where we’d like to be, between who we are now, and who we’d like to be. When we are always focused on where we’d like to be or who we’d like to be, how can we be happy? When we do this we are in a constant state of NOT HAVING what we really want. As you know, there is nothing fun about living this way.

So, what happens when you stop trying to have the very things you believe will make you happy? Conventional wisdom says that if you stop trying you start dying. Conventional wisdom says that if you stop struggling you set aside your chance at happiness.

Now, here’s the funny part. Our society is full of stories that fly in the face of this ‘conventional wisdom’. Stories of people who try and try and try to make something happen and are spectacularly unsuccessful. And then one day they stop trying so hard and relax. Invariably, the next thing that happens is that the very thing they worked so hard for suddenly appears as if by magic.

Well, we now know why this happens. When all of our attention is on having that thing that we lack, we literally hold it away from ourselves through our attention on its lack. We create more of that lack.

When we let it go, when we stop trying, when our attention shifts to enjoying the weather, or an ice cream, or our lovers smile, that wanted thing just seems to flow to us all on its own. No more effort required on our part.

Here is a great secret of life. You are not the one that makes things happen, you only think you are. Your job is to decide what it is you want and then let it go. It is then left up to the intelligence that creates worlds to deliver what will make you happy. And it will as long as you step out of the way long enough for it to deliver it.

Imagine having an Unseen Servant that carries out your every wish. Now imagine that someone has told you that there is no such thing as an unseen servant and that YOU are the one that must make EVERYTHING HAPPEN in your life.

So, what happens is that the Unseen Servant just continues doing what it does while you, not understanding, keep getting in the Unseen Servant’s way and blocking its best efforts.

So, what do you think would happen if you really understood what your role in life was? What would happen if you stopped trying so hard to make things happen? What would happen if you stepped aside and just let your Unseen Servant do what it does so perfectly?